just a random piece of shit

heey, lama banget ga ngepost. malem ini gue lagi ngebenahin hidup gue sendiri dan banyak hal yang gue coba untuk inget. ternyata hidup gue nggak selalu normal seperti yang selalu gue bayangin. terlibat masalah orang lain, sulking, crying, and asking too much.

but:

i know how she feels. I freakingly damn know which makes me uneasy. I don't want to understand, but it hurts. we share the same thoughts in a different way. It's too much, how many lies should I tell to avoid troubles? How many smiles I should fake? How many times should I pretend to not care? or siding with wrong people? I'm a complete failure, a complete mediocre. I couldn't protect my promise, and only worries from afar. And finally regret things when they already happen.

mungkin yang gue maksud gatau kalo itu dia. tapi tolong ya buat yang ngerasa, gue ngerti perasaan lo. gue masih peduli sama lo dari jauh. kalaupun ada apa-apa jangan ragu buat ketemu gue. karena gue tau rasanya. pada saat dibutuhin, lo ada. tapi pas udah dapet apa yang dipengenin, dilupain. yang sabar ya. pasti banyak yang bisa ngertiin lo :)

udah ya, itu aja yang bisa gue tumpahin. byebyeee

"I want to fly, fly, fly and never return."

Kagamine Rin ~Meltdown~

ineeesl